Great Read... for those who are interested

My friend Stacia gave me a couple books. One of which I read in about 30 min. It was so great and I want to share it with anyone who cares. The books is entitled, Can I tell you about Asperger Syndrome? It is a very simple way of telling people, friends, family, teachers about this developmental disorder. It explains things perfectly and gives suggestions about how to help those you may know with AS.

I am going to go through it with Carter one of these days. When we got his diagnosis I told him why we were seeing all these doctors and therapists, but he didn't seem interested in knowing anymore than his brain works differently. I thought I even told him that he has Asperger's. So I started to bring up the subject again while we were driving one day last week. He was sitting shot-gun and I said to him, "Carter, you know how you have Asperger's Syndrome?"

He whipped his head around so fast and exclaimed, "WHAT? I DO? WHERE IS IT? CAN YOU SEE IT?" I started laughing so hard, that I couldn't really get too deep into our little heart to heart. After I tried to calm him down, reassuring him that he's okay, I told him that he has lots of talents because of AS and also some difficulties that we are trying to help him with. I thought that was enough information at that point, but hopefully soon, I'll be able to finish the conversation.

In the following weeks, I will try to summarize some key points of the book that really pertain to Carter. The first one being, Reading Feelings. Most people can naturally know how other people are feeling and thinking by their 'body language.' They can read expressions on other's faces or hear feelings in their voices. This is referred to as 'tuning in' to other people. Most people can do this without thinking about it. But for Carter and other AS people, this is very hard to understand. They have to be taught it. Many people with AS don't look you in the eye when talking to you and in Carter's case, just plain ignore you at times. It doesn't mean they aren't listening or they are unfriendly. It just makes them uncomfortable or confused when looking people in the eye.

Carter's tutors spend time helping him read expressions on peoples faces by talking about pictures of people doing different things and expressing all sorts of emotions. It's crazy how he struggles to answer how someone is feeling just by looking at them.

For example, I got teary eyed this morning from a sweet text my sister sent and was wiping away my tears right as Carter walked in. Instead of saying, "What's wrong?" or "Why are you crying?" like most people would (even toddlers), Carter said to me, "Mom, I see water in your eyes." He didn't seem concerned, just stated the facts. He has a hard time empathizing or seeing things from another perspective.

But I won't say that he can't learn. I can remember a time where he did show a bit of sympathy... He and I were in the toy store and he was trying to decide what to buy with his birthday money. We were walking the isles and at one point I yawned. Carter looked over at me and said, "Mom, I'm sorry this is taking so long." I was shocked that he could or did associate my yawn with the possibility that I was bored. I hadn't said a word telling him to hurry up or that he was taking too long to decide, nothing. This sounds so silly, but it wasn't to me. I called Benn and my Mom and told them how impressed I was with that simple comment.

That's just a small bit about Carter for now. Don't want to completely bore anyone now :)